Grief in The Workplace

When employees view death differently As an employee, what happens when we experience a personal loss, yet life necessitates us to go to work everyday even when we are still in shock, need to take care of personal affairs and are not emotionally stable? And to complicate the situation even further, what happens when your co-workers and management team view death differently than you do? As grievers and employers unite on the subject of grief entering the workplace, an ultimate tug-of-war occurs: addressing the grievers needs while the employer ultimately struggles to create a fair environment for all employees and maintain business as usual for clients. As employees we are drawn together in the workplace by our career choice, talents and work ethic. For the most part, our family allegiances, ethnic and religious beliefs are generally left in the parking lot or at the front door. Nevertheless, when a family death occurs, these beliefs permeate the workplace as the employee begins the healing process and the co-workers try to provide comfort. An entirely different scenario arises when the death is that of an employee – the reaction of co-workers, management team and Human Resources personnel are confronted emotionally in an environment that is all too often ill-prepared. The notion of creating compassionate workplaces that support loss of life goes well beyond companies’ bereavement leave policies, which typically include providing personal time off and supporting an employee returning to work after a loss. A compassionate workplace must also take into account 1) an employee’s unique way of grieving; 2) his/her religious/cultural affiliation; and 3) the nature of the relationship with the deceased. Recently a company asked me to provide support to employees who experienced a sudden loss of a co-worker. Apparently,...

How to Comfort Someone Who Just Lost a Job...

A career coach offers six tips on what to say and do when a friend or loved one becomes unemployed Losing a job is an all too common, and often traumatic, experience. Years ago, I remember walking toward the exit on my last day at work, packed boxes in hand, alongside my manager. A colleague ran into us and asked my manager if she was leaving. I jumped in and said, “No, I’m leaving,” then burst into tears. Not knowing what to say, my co-worker instinctively gave me a big hug. If your friend, spouse or family member recently became unemployed, it can be hard to know exactly what to say and how to be helpful, beyond offering a hug and expressing sympathy. That’s especially true if the person held the position for many years and hitched his or her identity to the job title. Based on my experience as a career coach, I’d suggest you take these six steps to offer comfort and assistance: Acknowledge the loss. That’s what the colleague who gave me a big hug on my last day essentially did. Anyone who has just become unemployed will appreciate your recognizing the misfortune. Just keep your words simple with something like, “I’m sorry to hear the news.” When the person is ready to talk — and chances are, you’ll notice the signs — listen without adding your own commentary. Ask what he or she needs to ease the transition. Then offer to help. Maybe you can sort through the packed boxes together. Or you might provide a sympathetic ear, letting your friend or loved one talk about what it means to leave the position and how he or she feels about it. Assisting someone in making...